Burning Coal Reduces Life Expectancy by 5.5 Years

A study released this week shows that citizens in northern China live an average of 5.5 years less, partly due to pollution from burning coal for heat. Here are the feelings of the Chinese people.

“What cruel, sadistic god would make us choose between longevity and warmth?”
“I don’t need some study to tell me when I’m going to die.”
“It’s okay. The last five years is mostly shitting into bags anyway.”

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